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Tuesday, March 19, 2013

Birth Story

i realized after reading many friends' recent birth stories that perhaps i should stop telling people about mine. it was pretty drama-free and short... i think it only serves to make other people hate me.  so! if you've borne a child, and your labor & delivery was anything short of perfect... maybe you want to stop reading?

here goes!

i'd been having contractions for days, maybe even weeks. i was uncomfortable, sure, but there was no sign of real regularity.  i'd been walking the mall, doing yoga, eating spicy foods... i was REALLY ready to be done being pregnant. i wanted to meet the little guy already! we'd had some maternity photos done the week before (a little later than we should have, but i'm glad we did them...) but it was november, it still felt like an arizona august with the bun so snugly still in the oven, and i was DONE.

on november 14, i'd walked a few miles, and seth picked up a birthing ball for me.  by that evening, i was having regular contractions, 7-10 minutes apart lasting about a minute. they were uncomfortable, but not painful. i'd had my membranes swept the day before and i thought i might have had a high leak in my water.  early on in the evening, we stopped by the hospital to get checked out. i was (still) 3 cm & 90% effaced (i'd been at that for almost a week.) they determined i was not yet in active labor and no leaking water. they sent me home. *shakes fist at sky* i didnt want to be one of *those* first time moms who went to the hospital a dozen times only to be sent home a dozen times... but i waaaanted it to be time!

seth had his weblos over that night. while he was with them, i sat upstairs bouncing on the ball and timing contractions. very regular, not really increasing much in intensity. (and the ball REALLY helped the pressure in my back... i wish i'd bought it sooner. like... much sooner. i dont know what i was thinking.)

i didnt want to go back to the hospital to be sent away again... so i tried to go to sleep. by one, i realized sleep would not be happening. we got things ready and i made seth take me back to the hospital. after all the paperwork, we finally got into triage around 2:30 AM. i was still at a 3. before sending me home, in the wee hours of the morning, she asked me to walk around the hospital for an hour to see if things progressed. really? an hour? of walking around? at 2:30 AM? by the end of that hour, i was super pissed at that nurse. they were definitely getting worse. and, being 2:30 AM, nothing exciting was happening, nor could we go outside, so i had to settle for walking in circles while reading the pages from some stupid children's book they had framed on the walls. it was about a dumb coyote. i read it about a hundred times. which means i walked that circle about a hundred times. the nurse who ordered this walk of insanity needed to die. or at least be punched in the face.

when i sat down with the nurse an hour later, she went to check me and my water broke all over her. i not so secretly laughed at her for getting what was coming to her. i was at a 4 and the contractions were really starting to be painful. with the water broken, i felt intense pressure and was ready for my epidural :) the anesthesiologist was with another patient and i didnt see him for more than an hour. an hour of contractions one right on top of the other. they were lasting 60 - 90 seconds and only about that far apart.

its funny how movies, stories, etc. always seem to portray laboring moms as these crazy monsters. i always thought this was an exaggeration. and maybe i still think so. but still... i definitely turned into someone i didnt recognize. during our birthing class, our instructor told our husbands to be sure to ask before doing things. it sounded so silly. who wouldnt want a massage? apparently this girl. and i reeeeeally didnt appreciate his normally-oh-so-charming smirk. i went all elizabeth banks from what to expect when you're expecting on him and i think i threatened to punch him in the face. sorry honey. i didnt mean it, i love you so much :)

with that epidural placed, i'd progressed to a 6 in an hour and i finally got a good rest. it was now 5 or so and i was happy to take a nap. when the nurse came in two hours later, i was at a 10 and it was time to start pushing.

during my pregnancy, i went to a clinic of doctors, which meant one of any 3 doctors could be the one on call to deliver me. i only liked one of them. the first time i came to the hospital (the night before) the one who couldnt speak english was there. by the time i came in the second time, the one who was a little mean was on call. but by 7 AM... my favorite doctor was on call. so at 6:55, when it was time to start, the sweet, wonderful nurse let me request her instead of the meanie. i couldnt have been more thrilled. plus, this sweet nurse, who was supposed to get off at 7, decided to stay to see our little guy!

they asked me if i wanted a mirror. before giving birth, the idea of this would have repulsed me. of course i would not want to watch. but in the moment, it sounded like a great idea. and with the epidural, i wasnt feeling much pressure, so it was nice to see my progress. and i promise, when its you, and your beautiful, perfect little miracle coming into the world... its not gross.

after pushing for only twenty minutes, and 9 loooong months of waiting, we finally got to meet our perfect little man!

i know a lot of people dont think epidurals are a good idea. i suppose to some degree i can at least understand their line of thinking. i like feeling in control, too, so after my birthing class and realizing i couldnt labor in any position i wanted, i felt a little frustrated and confused about my decision to get an epidural. i also worried a little that i would miss out on the "bonding" people speak of that comes from enduring labor & delivery unmedicated.

after having an epidural, and a labor & delivery lasting only about 4 hours, meeting my baby rested and cheerful (still tired, but completely and totally present), i could not speak highly enough of having an epidural. again, i can agree that L&D is sooooo different for everyone, so i think its actually pretty irresponsible to make blanket generalizations. i'm sure its not for everyone. but it was definitely the right decision for me!